But What If I'm Not Coherent Enough To See Sanjaya Ousted?

Hiya folks. It's Tuesday night and I'm looking at my elbow with a wistful, longing look. My flawless, but freckled skin will be swollen and probably black & blue this time tomorrow night.

Yup, CruiserMel is going under the knife tomorrow. And I'm a little uneasy because they said they don't plan on putting me under. Dammit. Oh, he says he's going to make me "feel funny and talk even funnier," but seriously - I have to stay alert?

WTF?

I'm being punished for letting my tennis elbow go on wayyyyy too long back in 2004. Back then, I did the physical therapy route (and had a ferocious crush on my therapist - is that normal?), did two rounds of steroid shots in the joint, but eventually had some surgery to fix the problem. They must have used chopsticks to do it, because all I had to show for it was two little scars that look like cigarette burns.

Then this year, perhaps flared up by my cross-country pursuit of rock & roll and thus schlepping luggage around, I found myself back in the doctor's office for yet another steroid shot. Yeah, it worked - for a whole 10 days.

After more tests and my own griping about "but it hurts!" they realized that it wasn't the original tendonitis (tennis elbow) that was giving me fits, but a pinched nerve. They won't use the chopsticks this time - oh no, they're using ginzu knives (maybe I'm making that part up...). Either way, my pretty little elbow will be scarred for life.

See? I told you it hurt!

So - I will not eat nor drink anything after midnight tonight. Not even bourbon or Triscuits. I will roll out of bed in the A and head for the hospital where I will be poked, prodded, and hacked away at in a region of my body that has given me grief for way too long. I will be sent home with an array of pain-killers which will probably spawn a creative streak never before seen, yet I won't be able to do a thing about it.

Because, in typical CruiserMel style, I didn't ask some really important questions like: How long before I can blog again? How will this affect my "art?" What, no blogging??????

So, kiddies, I will do my very best to give you a report as soon as I can - but it might be one-handed - and thus in code. I hope y'all don't forget about me. I certainly won't forget about you! (except while I'm on pain-killers)

Please keep checking back, pweeze? I promise something by the weekend - if only the before and after photos.

Stay tuned!