The Self-Indulgent Nutball Christmas Letter

Let me start with saying that I hope each and every one of you and your's had a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday. Mine was pretty much the usual - over to brother & sis-in-law's house for yummies, the slap in the face that says "you're not married, CruiserMel?" and 1/2 a bottle of red wine, by myself. Normally, imbibing half a bottle of wine wouldn't be a big deal, but at 1:00 in the afternoon, 'tis not so good for CruiserMel. Let's just say, once I got home and piled onto the sofa with CruiserDog, I couldn't reach the remote for the TV, so I was forced to watch the Cowboys absolutely trounce the Buccaneers. Okay, I like football, but I hate to witness a total beating, so this game didn't give me chills. Somehow I didn't particularly care. And since it would take energy to reach the remote.....ah, screw it.

I'm finally coming back to the land of the living (i.e. I've digested AND John Mayer's on Letterman tonight and let's just say I'm a-twitter) and I'm seeing all these Christmas commercials on TV, along with previews of the local news with people already lined up at the Best Buy or Sears or Bed Bath & Beyond or whatever to get the newest Barbie doll or Playstation crap and I'm finding myself involuntarily catapulted into Christmas mode.

I love those letters that some send out with Christmas cards that cover all the fun things people have done / accomplished in the past 12 months. Some don't care for these, but I actually love them. I've even been known to send one out of my own a time or two. It's been a couple of years since I did one, but I'm feeling the need to connect with my peeps in 2006.

Here's the problem: In the grand scheme of things, I've led a pretty dull life this year. I haven't cured cancer. I haven't gone to Egypt to dig up stuff. I haven't paid millions of dollars to fly on the space shuttle. I haven't even changed that bulb that lights up the driveway.

What I have done probably sounds very self-indulgent. And it is. (I've become my MasterCard company's best customer as I have spent countless dinero travelling the country to recapture my youth at concerts.) So my question is - how does one not sound self-indulgent and yet share some happy adventures with loved ones? And not sound like a complete nutball?

Heck, maybe I'll just make something up. Yeah, that's the ticket.

Happy Thanksgiving, Y'all! It's late - so go make a turkey sammich or revisit the Tums bottle. Doesn't matter - just quit hanging around here! Didn't you see the "No Loitering" sign?