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Dallas, Texas, United States

Friday, December 01, 2006

8 Minutes

Folks, you can be proud of CruiserMel. Yup, I realized I had failed y'all earlier in the week, okay twice, but under the influence of pure, raw "get me outta this situation", I did it. In the daylight! At my kitchen table.

But not without a little help. That's right, kiddies, I had "THE SCRIPT" next to me, all marked up with possible dialogue and some of the lines were actually highlighted (hey, I was nervous!). Though I have never met Golightly, my new hero, I felt her presence right there in the kitchen - threatening me with "I'll get Kate to pick up the extension and get this done & overwith if you don't pare this down to less than 10 minutes, wuss!" [Kate scares me.] I don't know how to link the script, but try looking here under http://dramatidbits.blogspot.com/2006/11/infamous-script.html Wow, it worked. I rule.

The call began at 3:26 and was wrapped up in 8 minutes. It would've been about 4 minutes, but he's a talker.

He: Blah blah blah and then this happened and then we're using new software and did you get out of work early yesterday and it sure was cold last night and something about cats and you have big plans this weekend?

Me: STOP. I need to say something and I don't have alot of time, so just let me say this, okay?

He: Uh.....O......kay.

Me: Whatever this is with us, I'm just not getting a connection. I'm just not feelin' it. And I have to be feelin' it to make it worth the effort. You're a really nice guy and I admit I had a good time Tuesday night, but I just don't have a good vibe. (yes, I actually used that word - WTF?) I really hate to waste your time. And mine.

He: Well. Okay. I see. I guess you have to live life to learn a lesson. [what?]


Me: Alrighty then....... well good luck with selling your house and have a great weekend. It's been nice. (click)

Nice? Of all words. Admittedly it wasn't verbatim to Golightly's script, but it sure was close. And thank goodness I had it right there with me as a security blanket. Predicaments like these send me back to age 15 all over again, and 15 wasn't a particularly good year for CruiserMel, self-esteemwise.

Poor Mr. Nice Guy is probably licking his wounds now, so that makes me Miss Mean Ole Mel and that doesn't feel so good, but these things are rarely a happy occasion, right? That doesn't mean I didn't do a little happy dance when I hung up the phone. My feet sprouted wings. Little happy free wings just made for dancing in the privacy of one's kitchen. You know that line about "dance like nobody's watching"? That's what I did. And I'm still doing it. The sprinkler dance, the vogue, the dang cabbage patch dance. I even did a little chicken dance for good measure. If I'd had a football, I would've spiked it. It was magnificent. And I felt really triumphant. I'm baaaaaaackkkkk!!!!!!! And my chicken wings are gone.

Thanks go to my sisters in the blogosphere. If it weren't for you gals, I'd....well, I wouldn't be dancing in my kitchen like a dork.

Ooooo cool, "Pretty Vegas" by INXS is on the radio. Gotta go dance some more!

*hugs* to all y'all. That's plural, ya know. Happy Weekend! Now GO. DANCE!


Blakken said...

Well then, (clearing my throat), it was interesting to say the least to learn about nice guy! All I can say can't wait for the next victim. :)

Mr. Fabulous said...

I don't have to dance to THAT song, do I? :)

Dezdmona said...

I can visualize you dancing...now I feel like a voyeur into your world.

Hey...but I was invited in.

Now, where are you gonna find that elusive, rich, stable Cabana Boy to sweep you off your feet?

Anonymous said...

I am clapping for you!!

But seriously did he really try to give you some wishy washy live for the moment quote while breaking up?!?! HA HA HA.
I know he didn't!!

That is funny & Congratulations!

Maybe I could start a business and rent my friends out, hee hee.
so proud of you and you didn't need anyone to run interference for you, you got the job DONE.

Swishy said...

OH, MY GOSH, I am so impressed!!! Good for you! I'm so passive-aggressive. I need to get braver.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the football reference. See? I knew you'd come around.

Bev said...

"I guess you have to live life to learn a lesson." - huh? what?

Congrats to you for letting him out of your life.

n8 b said...

The sprinkler, Vogue, Cabbage Patch and Chicken dance but no Shopping Cart or Lawn mower???? What's the matter with you?

CruiserMel said...

Okay, dumbbunny here. I don't know how to do the shopping cart or the lawn mower....it sounds like too much work.